Once upon a time there was a nice blonde innocent girl named Britt. And she didn't ever get photgraphed doing bad things like those other Hollywood kids. Little Britt had always been cute. Boys liked her even when they were in the throws of sexual latency.
One night, Britt put on a cute little plaid dress. And like always, she took her little red purse. She went to see some boys. But the boys were crazy! She was going to play with her secret powder toy.
The boys knew that she liked to play with her toy in private, but then they did something really crazy. They took out a camera!
Lucky for Britt, the power of the plaid dress was strong. She put her red purse on the table. She was so nervous? What if the boys took her powder toy? What if the purse mysteriously fell and the powder toy popped out?
But the power of the plaid proved to be much, much stronger than she knew. Or maybe it was a combination of Britt's blue eyes and her plaid? Maybe the two forces aligned. After all, she kept her hands off the purse and she kept her eyes on the camera. Everyone else was laughing because they had been playing with thir own powder toys, but not Britt. Nor her purse.
She smiled big and waited until the silly boy with the camera was done snapping.
When the pictures came out on the internet, she was looking at the camera while all the boys were looking silly, like they had been playing too much with their powder toys.
And Britt lived hapily, semi-famously, non-notoriously ever after.